Ford factory fire sale


Aussie automotive heritage is up for grabs as Ford Australia prepares to dispose of manufacturing assets in Melbourne and Geelong


In my view this is nothing less than an attack by stealth on reason and matters of fact. The health of society is at stake. On this point, I’m not actually joking, or even hamming it up - it’s a very serious threat to fundamental freedom.

Ford is in fact selling its former factories in Shitsville, and it does hope to realise $75 million from the sale. The land, in total covers 85 hectares - that’s about 85 football fields comprising about 265,000 square metres of factory and warehouse space - about one-seventh of the total area.

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Of course, the chick who runs Ford in ‘Straya this week, Kay Hart - back in your box, feminists: she is a chick, and she is running Ford, this week … QED. Kay Hart could not help herself. Clearly this was an opportunity to stand in front of a camera and/or a microphone. Ms Hart described the intention to sell the sites as:

“...part of our broader business transformation plan.”

That’s one way to put paddling up Shit Creek into context I guess. Unfortunately, Ms Hart decided not to shut up at that point, which would have been my advice:

“We remain invested in, and committed to, the communities in which we live and work.”

I’d like to know how many people and exactly what resources at Ford Shistville are in fact devoted to investment in and commitment to the communities, blah, blah, blah. I suspect very few, if any, tangible resources are devoted to this objective.

Perhaps, for perspective, we should interview the 1300 people who lost their jobs at Ford, and ask how invested in and committed to they feel, five years down the track. Perhaps they are best placed to rate Ms Hart’s soundbites on a scale of one to minus infinity for accuracy and sensitivity…

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To me this is just another example of the medical condition known to neuroscience as ‘C-squared BFSD Syndrome’ or ‘Compulsive CEO Brain Fart Soundbite Disorder.

It’s on the rise, worryingly, and I’ve been investigating the phenomenology:

I’ve met about 50 carmaker and related industry CEOs. I’m certainly no neurobiologist, but I formed the view that more than half of them were pretty clearly C-Squared BFSD sufferers. Actually it’s we who suffer - they just brain fart and expect us to Hoover it up.

Just to be clear, ‘CEO’ in Australia is kind of a joke job title. If you’re a major carmaker, and you’ve got some promising junior-burger executive in the wings, you can send him to Arse-Trailer under the following threat:

Manage that southern hemisphere shithole for us. I know it’s a cultural void. Look, don’t swim in the ocean or walk out into the backyard - you’ll probably get eaten. Or worse.

Remain indoors if possible, and just don’t fuck it up too badly for the next 18 months, and when you get back, we’ll give you a real job. How’s that sound?

The new Muppet gets off the plane, Kim Jong Un in the boardroom, treats everyone like crap, issues decrees like friggin Moses with the tablets, takes an overseas conference call once a week, bungs it on for the boys upstairs, gets photographed with models and celebrity ambassadors, does the bullshit soundbite brain fart shuffle, and hopes to be recalled to civilisation ASAP.

These people rule internally by fiat - what they say goes, and for a narcissist this is a dangerously seductive environment. Unfortunately, they often presume the same level of unquestioning compliance with their pronouncements when they make external statements. It’s disgracefully self-centred.

This is the canvas upon which car company decisions here in Shitsville are often painted.


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