ACCC sues Mazda for deceptive and unconscionable conduct
The ACCC just woke up (amazing). Plus, they’ve invited Mazda to a public ankle-grabbing contest, which should be terribly entertaining over coming months
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The ACCC has decided to sue Mazda Australia for alleged breaches of consumer law and behaving like unprincipled cocks generally in relation to customer support.
Related: Should you still consider buying a Mazda in light of these allegations?
Apparently the ACCC has assembled a conga line of disgruntled customers - I think they call them ‘witnesses’ now - stretching over the horizon, back to 2013, and the watchdog says Mazda dickheads could not fix the problems, fobbed them off to case managers who were completely ineffective, lied about the severity of faults, and told the affected owners they were not entitled to refunds - which is such bullshit, but pretty typical for the Shitsvillian car industry.
ACCC allegations
“We allege that Mazda repeatedly refused to provide a refund or a replacement at no cost to the consumers and pressured them to accept lesser offers which were made by Mazda only after multiple failures of the vehicles and repeated attempted repairs.” - ACCC chair Rod Sims
This is the one that does my head in: The ACCC says in cases of protracted problems, instead of offering a refund or a free replacement vehicle, which is what the law demands, Mazda customers were offered less money than their cars were actually worth as a buyback - and then, Mazda arseholes put owners under extreme pressure to accept their bullshit offers, by claiming the offers were short-term and final.
The mafia does business this way.
If true, it means those pricks at Mazda were profiteering from their own design and manufacturing deficiencies, and their inability to fix them in service. #arseholes
“Consumers do not have to make any financial contribution to receive the remedies they are entitled to under the Australian Consumer Law,” - ACCC chair Rod Sims
I think a lot of people still do not know this.
When customers got fed up and demanded a refund, Mazda Cocks allegedly got in their faces and invited them to sue - which is a pretty daunting prospect for ordinary folk because in most consumer law tribunals, each party bears its own legal costs.
13 points out of a possible 10 there for outright corporate cockheaddery, exploiting the customer’s systematically weaker position, and intrinsic vulnerability. You dicks. Allegedly.
“The ACCC remains alarmed about the barrage of issues consumers face when they attempt to exercise their consumer rights because there is a problem with a new vehicle they have purchased.” - ACCC chair Rod Sims
I stress that these ACCC allegations have yet to be proved in court.
Yet to be proved
On this, just to open the window into reporting on this, I have to be somewhat careful. This is a matter before the court and I really don’t want to receive a writ for contempt. Which is the main risk reporters face on matters such as this. Courts hate commentary as much as corporations.
I’m specifically not permitted to speculate on Mazda’s guilt or innocence, nor may I speculate about an appropriate penalty. Judges hate it when you do that.
So just for the record, I’m making no imputation about that, either way. I’m not a lawyer. I don’t know the full facts. Let the court decide. All I’ll say on this is: It’s a bad look for Mazda. The ACCC’s allegations are very detailed and appear not to be fictional.
Opinion
I will say generally that carmakers indulging in this kind of power play bullshit with customers is truly reprehensible. Negotiating away any legal entitlements, such as refunds, is illegal. It’s also morally repugnant.
The ACCC alleges that it has amassed quite a few Mazda arseholery case studies. One vehicle, the ACCC says, was off the road for four incredible months out of a six-month ownership term.
"If a vehicle cannot be repaired within a reasonable time or at all, consumers have a right under the Australian Consumer Law to a refund or replacement, and manufacturers cannot refuse these claims." - ACCC
The ACCC has clearly spent months to years investigating these alleged Mazda breaches, and given the calibre and specificity of the statements made by Rod Sims recently about Mazda, including one alleged incident where the punters never actually made it to their tribunal hearing because their Mazda shitheap filled up with fumes en route - I mean - that’s perfect. This is just made for satire … I mean, it doesn’t even need to be satirised. It’s already written.
There are also cars dealers just forgot about, conveniently, for weeks - the thousands of dollars negotiated away in extortionate settlement offers - allegedly. The impression I get is that the watchdog has compiled an orgy of anti-consumer evidence against those Mazda cocks.
I’m certain the ACCC would have conducted a risk assessment on this and decided to proceed on their assessment being the balance of probability pointing to a successful prosecution. Because that’s how they roll. They generally don’t sue on the vague possibility of a ‘maybe’ prosecution. But it’s all yet to be proved, or dismissed.
Mazda’s response
Of course, those Mazda dicks say they will (quote-unquote) “vigorously defend” their alleged arseholery. And to be fair, they’re on the back foot here, and they’re really used to dealing only with motoring journalists, which is the media equivalent of a massage with a happy ending.
Mazda issued a statement that is straight out of the infinitely sanitised PR bullshit playbook in my view - nauseatingly so. The statement in part says Mazda Shitsville:
“...consistently exceeds its legal obligations.” - Mazda statement
I’m not going to inflict it all on you, but this is brilliant:
“Mazda Australia’s objective is to always provide the ultimate customer experience.” - Mazda statement
Pro tip for the borderline illiterate Mazda Muppet who wrote that, and the similarly spasticated senior manager who approved it: Do not split the friggin’ infinitive unless you are William fucking Shatner. If you’re not ‘the Shat’ it’s ‘always to provide’ - the verb is ‘to provide’. Especially if you are a communications professional, allegedly.
And realise, of course, that the term ‘ultimate’ (ultimate customer experience) is not necessarily a good experience. ‘Ultimate’ cuts both ways. One can have an ultimate customer experience in the ‘very bad’ domain as well.
Which is positively delicious, I think you’d agree, in the context of that statement, because the ACCC is also alleging you Mazda twats have provided an impressive set of ‘ultimate’ customer experiences indeed… Only, not in a good way.
Perhaps I am the only person in the universe who finds this hilarious. These Keystone Cops PR statements...
I’ll be using that one in my upcoming book: Retardospeak - how to make absurd public statements, guaranteed to get a run.
ACCC objectives
A smorgasbord of zero lube reaming options is being laid out for the ACCC’s after party, if successful. These include:
“…penalties, declarations, injunctions, consumer redress, a publication order, and a court order requiring the instigation of a compliance program.” - ACCC objective outcomes
If there were a works burger at the ‘you fucked this up’ milk bar, that’s pretty much what you’ll be chowing down on.
Contemporary Mazda
To be fair, Mazda does some excellent work - the company’s technical innovation in particular is excellent. But they are profoundly up themselves. Every buyer gets a nauseating, ‘lost in translation’ Japanese cultural indoctrination lesson in every brochure.
That ‘jinba ittai’ - the feeling where the samurai and the horse becoming ‘as one’. I’m sure it’s meaningful if you grew up in Tokyo, did ju jutsu, appreciate shibumi. But here in Shitsville I’ve never wanted to be ‘as one’ with a horse. (Call me old fashioned.) When I hear jinba ittai I’m just thinking up the next ‘horse humper’ joke, frankly. I’m shallow like that.
(That’s bestiality and cultural insensitivity in the one paragraph, above - a troll ‘two for one’ I’d suggest. Knock yourself out, in the comments. I double dead dingo’s donger dare you…)
An inevitable consequence of this Mazda tech innovation is: teething problems in service. Therefore, I’d suggest to you senior Mazda dickheads in Australia and Japan, that dealing with these effectively simply must be part of the roll-out strategy. You have to keep customers happy. Problems happen. How you deal with them matters.
If breaking the law is part of that process, then you have lost the race before even getting out on the grid. Unfortunately, my impression of Mazda Australia is that the products are OK but the company is completely up itself. I’ve said that before.
Mazda is the number two seller here, which is an anomaly compared with most other countries - where it’s still perceived as a bit of a dog brand. I’m looking at you, Canukistan. Brexitpotamia. This success here is a breeding ground for extreme hubris.
Vinesh Bhindi is the current managing director of Mazda Shitsville - a former sales dude. I’m disinclined to agree with his statements about customer support excellence, in light of the ACCC’s allegations.
Industry reform: You can help
And I think you should let Mr Bhindi know exactly what you think of the kind of conduct which the ACCC alleges Mazda Shitsville has engaged in.
Don’t bother with the ‘contact us’ page on Mazda’s website - I have a far better plan. Send an e-mail to Mark Flintoft, who is the holder of the Mazda Shitsville corporate communications and public relations poisoned chalice. mflintoft@mazda.com.au
(He’s gunna hate me for giving his address out, and I’m going to decline to give a shit on that. Which seems fair, in light of the objective - which would be industry-wide customer service reform.) Two infinitives there, in that first sentence; neither split. Take a note. That’s how you do it…
At the risk of philosophising on this: Ghandi said: “be the change that you wish to see in the world”. So get off your arse and send Mr Flintoft an e-mail.
Companies like Mazda are obsessed with public opinion. Obsessed. And right now, that obsession is heightened. At the risk of being Japanese on this: always strike when and where your opponent is vulnerable. (Just channeling my inner Miyamoto Mushashi. There’s no Marquis of Queensbury in that world.)
One or two disgruntled e-mails to Mazda - no big deal. Hundreds to thousands of similarly outraged, disappointed e-mails … Houston, we’ve had a main bus B undervolt. It doesn’t look good. And you can help.
The pro tip here, with your e-mail: Be polite but firm - don’t be rude. Keep it ‘PG’. Don’t deploy the ‘F’ or ‘C’ bombs. Don’t make it personal. But convey exactly how the ACCC’s allegations make you feel about Mazda, and how this development is going to inform your new vehicle purchasing decisions.
I’d express my view through the prism of the ACCC being something of an impartial agency which usually errs on the side of being too soft, whereas Mazda’s defensive statements are entirely self-serving.
In my view, you acting now can achieve more, potentially, in terms of customer service reform than even a multi-million-dollar settlement in court.
I’m pretty sure they’ll have a crisis meeting about it, once a critical mass of e-mails is forthcoming. Which is what we want.
Be the change that you wish to see in the world.
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